So what is the difference between hearing and listening? Hearing is the physical process of recognising sound. Listening is a mental process. You can have the greatest message in the world. However, if nobody is listening, it’s lost.
You are likely to have heard the phrase “active listening” before. With active listening, you listen to someone and then repeat what you understand in your own words back to them. Essentially, you’re paraphrasing. The idea is that you create mutual understanding so that there are no ambiguities in interpretation. This concept of mutual understanding is central for driving action in most communication strategies
The true magic of active listening lies in your ability to understand the conversation from the perspective of the person you are talking to and your willingness to genuinely invest time in listening to their full story. This means that you listen without formulating your response.
We’ve all done it, especially in debate situations where you’re ready to fire back. However, that’s not healthy, and it’s not productive. Doing that in the workplace will demoralise those around you and make you seem less of a team player.
If you’re ready to become a better listener, do these things:
Check your ego. You cannot listen if you’re more worried about your own personal outcome in a conversation than creating a positive outcome for all involved.
Stop thinking about your response. If you’re formulating your response in your head while the other person is speaking, you’re not listening!
Show engagement non verbally. A slight tilt of the head, a forward lean of the body, head nods, small “uh-huh” utterances, maintaining eye contact … all these things encourage engagement in a conversation and are indicators of listening.
Admit when you didn’t listen. Or at least ask someone to repeat themselves. “I didn’t quite catch that. Could you please repeat?” It’s better to have the full picture in a conversation than to make a judgment on something without all the puzzle pieces in play.
Use active listening. Make sure you heard what the person intended. So many unnecessary conflicts could be avoided in the workplace and so many teams would run more smoothly if people would just check for mutual understanding.
